In what commentators are calling an act of God, the M50 Northbound at Ballymount will be closed due to a volcanic eruption in the area. The volcano, named ‘askmebollix’, has led to 750 metric tons of nonsense being spewed into the airwaves every second as gobshites around the country add their tuppence.
Literally hundreds of people [...]

Dun Laoghaire Harbour. The boulevard of broken dreams. A lonely Tayto packet whistles across the rain-spattered jetty, near where the group of Irish mammies are huddled in the cold, waving goodbye to their sons. One of them crushes a fag butt beneath her sodden Louboutins and turns away. She can’t look [...]

News that festering pork-slit, Mary Lou McDonald, has crashed out of public life has been greeted with enthusiasm by anyone with two brain cells to rub together, according to initial reports on the public reaction to last Friday’s elections.
“Who the fuck is she kidding with her stupid face and her crap mullet? She has [...]

A Stoneybatter man’s private club may have to be disbanded after an error in the Golden Pages brought about some unwarranted attention.
The Dublin Groomer’s Association, operating from Dermot Happle’s basement, has been in existance since 1997, the same time at which Yahoo first launched their Java powered chat rooms. Since then it has been a [...]

“Wait… WHOA! Can you guys actually see what we’re doing?!?”
Such were the words of one senior Irish Life & Permanent executive after it emerged that Anglo Irish Bank and IL&P had been playing a game of ‘give me the lend of four to six billion euro, will you?’
Anglo Irish Bank came in for further… well [...]

A major Irish blogger, whose hilarious moniker your correspondent cannot speak for fear of reprisals from her corporate overlords, has been all but silenced by major Irish companies intent on selfishly having their employees actually earn their miserable wages during the course of their working days.  Our unnamed hero, who despite the made-up nature of [...]

The government is to distribute shares of Anglo Irish Bank amongst the public once the nationalisation is ratified in the Dail on Tuesday. Each house will be sent a booklet containing up to 50 shares, depending on how many people are resident, their Dublin postcode (if applicable) and the employment status.
Each share provides €1,256 worth [...]

On the first day of his official visit to Japan Taoiseach Brian Cowen has denied any falling out with Minister for Finance, Brian Lenihan, and said Ireland needs to look at Japan in order to get the economy going on.
On rumours of a dispute between himself and Minister Lenihan he said “There’s nothing to it. [...]

Ireland was thrown into chaos this weekend as pork products were banned from shelves across the country. The ban came as test results revealed the presence of harmful dioxin-like PCBs in the meat.
Without wishing to scaremonger at this difficult time the Irish Sentinel can only come to one conclusion: Ireland is [...]

It’s good news for lushes, sots, drunkards, rummies, barflies and alcos across Ireland as publicans have announced a one year price freeze.
The gloomy economic outlook, rising unemployment, and more people opting to drink at home has put pressure on the industry to get revellers back in to bars. The Licenced Vintners Federation (LVF) and the [...]