Newspaper of the Century | The 2008 Hijinx Awards

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January 5, 2009

Cowen heads to Las Vegas to shore up public finances

Arnold Corns
Posted by : Arnold Corns
Filed under : Irish News, Politics

Taoiseach Brian Cowen will leave Ireland for Las Vegas later today in an attempt to balance the country’s books.
With a delegation that will include Minister for Finance, Brian Lenihan, and Cowen’s personal henchman and bodyguard, Mary Coughlan, the Fianna Fail leader will ‘hit the slots’ to try and win enough money to keep the country [...]


November 14, 2008

Massive plunge in Fianna Fáil popularity

Fintan Chevalier
Posted by : Fintan Chevalier
Filed under : Irish News, Politics

According to the latest opinion poll, Fianna Fáil popularity amongst the Irish public is at an all-time low. In a fancy Pacman shaped pie-chart in today’s Irish Times, Fine Gael lead the poll with 34%, while Cowen and the Fianna Fáil rat circus languish in the doldrums with a paltry 2%. This places the [...]


November 12, 2008

MEP Crowley says Czech mate to Klaus

Arnold Corns
Posted by : Arnold Corns
Filed under : Irish News, Politics

Fianna Fail MEP and part-time Michael Bolton impersonator, Brian Crowley, has blasted Czech president Vaclav Klaus as ‘a silly little prick’ for comments he made about Ireland and the Lisbon treaty.
President Klaus was in Ireland to meet with Libertas, the shady underground movement many believe to be the inspiration for Quantum in the new James [...]


October 31, 2008

Minister for insulation strikes again

Arnold Corns
Posted by : Arnold Corns
Filed under : Irish News, Politics

There was more hot water for the government last night as Minister for Integration, Conor Lenihan, referred to Fine Gael TD Olwyn Enright as a ‘cock sucking crack whore’.
The exchange, which took place during last night’s debate to bring about the 2008 Mentallers on the Streets legislation, sparked outrage from opposition members with Michael Ring [...]


October 21, 2008

Independent TD ‘claims’ Mary Harney

Arnold Corns
Posted by : Arnold Corns
Filed under : Irish News, Politics

Independent TD Finian McGrath has called on Mary Harney to meet him after Dail today for a punch-up over the medical card issue.
Not content with simply withdrawing support for the government the Dublin North-Central TD has promised supporters that he’ll give the Minister for Health the ‘kicking she deserves’. A friend of McGrath’s told the [...]


October 10, 2008

Honesty the best policy for Biffo and pals

Arnold Corns
Posted by : Arnold Corns
Filed under : Irish News, Politics

With the budget looming the government has decided a new approach is needed to reassure citizens that they know what they’re doing.
Nicknamed ‘Honesty First’ it is expected that ministers from all departments, and even the Taoiseach, will admit to errors in order to let people know they can fix them. “How can anybody have any [...]


September 24, 2008

Dail debate sparks angry words

Arnold Corns
Posted by : Arnold Corns
Filed under : Politics

The Dail resumed after its summer break today and the opposition were quick to round on the government for the state of the economy.
Leading the charge was Labour leader Eamonn Gilmore who accused Taoiseach Brian Cowen of doing nothing and claimed that 146,000 people had lost their jobs since he took over as leader of [...]