The strange and wondrous convention known only as ‘Irish banking’ was thrown into chaos last night with the news that ‘He-who-must-not-be-named’ was one of the key investors who borrowed hundreds of millions of euro to buy shares in the pathetic, failed, disgraceful and disgusting Anglo Irish Bank.
In response to the news, the chief financial officer [...]

A Minister of State has today contended that the Government cannot identify the ten individuals involved in the €451 million transaction to purchase shares in Anglo Irish Bank.
Dick Roche, Minister for Dwarves, Midgets and Flids, said that Brian Lenihan, Minister for Finance, told him the individuals could not be named for complex financial reasons.
“He said [...]

The government is to distribute shares of Anglo Irish Bank amongst the public once the nationalisation is ratified in the Dail on Tuesday. Each house will be sent a booklet containing up to 50 shares, depending on how many people are resident, their Dublin postcode (if applicable) and the employment status.
Each share provides €1,256 worth [...]

Anglo Irish Bank chief Sean Fitzpatrick’s life goes from bad to worse. After resigning having hidden €87m worth of loans from the bank he is accused of hiding all the staples in the head office and selling them Romanians who peddle them at traffic lights. A file is being prepared for the DPP.
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The stars of [...]