His country may subsist on a diet of boiled mud and mysogo-genocide, but that hasn’t stopped Kim Jong Il from launching an early bid to make himself Top of the Pops this Christmas. 
The North Korean Premier hopes to croon his way around any number of meaningless UN resolutions to secure a live performance in the [...]

It may be doom and gloom for economies, but one silver lining this Spring is the booming business of fiscal metaphors. Once the sole province of David ‘pass the cocaine’ McWilliams, this intellectual space is now swarmed by every balding, right-wing, conservative-religious commentator the midlands can cough up. 
On Wednesday, Bruce Arnold of the Irish Indepedent [...]

Pope Benedict the ‘Aw shit, he’s not coming to dinner is he?? I better warn the Pfeiffers..’ has sought to silence critics with the news that he will appear on the improv comedy show Whose Line Is It Anyway? But Vatican insiders are concerned that this format may not suit the clanger-prone Pontiff. 
Speaking under fear [...]

The strange and wondrous convention known only as ‘Irish banking’ was thrown into chaos last night with the news that ‘He-who-must-not-be-named’ was one of the key investors who borrowed hundreds of millions of euro to buy shares in the pathetic, failed, disgraceful and disgusting Anglo Irish Bank.
In response to the news, the chief financial officer [...]

A Minister of State has today contended that the Government cannot identify the ten individuals involved in the €451 million transaction to purchase shares in Anglo Irish Bank.
Dick Roche, Minister for Dwarves, Midgets and Flids, said that Brian Lenihan, Minister for Finance, told him the individuals could not be named for complex financial reasons.
“He said [...]

The Labour Party is to table a Dáil motion today calling on the Government to ’shut the fuck up’ for a period of not less than 3 months.
Labour leader Eamon Gilmore, along with party colleagues, drafted the motion at a secret convention in an upstairs room at Buswell’s Hotel last Saturday night. The Labour Party’s [...]

The Irish Sentinel has secured a full length, n0-holds barred interview with Declan Ganley which we bring to you now.

Also, coming up this week, a Blog Awards special in which we preview all the candidates for all the awards in all the categories. New columnist John Waters is working on the copy as we speak.

Senior figures in Government are in dire need of sexual healing, say insiders, but the social partners are resolute in their refusal to bend over and take it in the ass like usual. Naturally this is causing problems because, as one source in the Department of the Taoiseach pointed out, a partnership without butt sex [...]

Reports are reaching us from Leinster House that the government is frantically putting together new legislation which will allow for a ’snow tax’ to be introduced.
As many parts of the country have been hit with heavy snowfalls unsuspecting home owners could be forced to pay depending on how much snow has stuck in their garde.
A [...]

Leading Naturalist and broadcaster, Sir David Attenborough has predicted that the drastic changes we are currently seeing in the global climate could soon lead to sub zero temperatures in the Mediterranean, sub-Saharan Africa and even in the firey pits of hell.
 Attenborough forecasts that a reversal of global warming caused by a new phenomenon known as [...]