The heavenly hosts are gearing up for a real jamboree this Wednesday ahead of God’s much anticipated annual trip to earth. One highly placed source within heaven said: 
“April Fools is the one day of the year when the Gods can walk amongst men. No matter what manner of miracles are wrought, humanity resolutely refuses to [...]

Pope Benedict the ‘Aw shit, he’s not coming to dinner is he?? I better warn the Pfeiffers..’ has sought to silence critics with the news that he will appear on the improv comedy show Whose Line Is It Anyway? But Vatican insiders are concerned that this format may not suit the clanger-prone Pontiff. 
Speaking under fear [...]

Flushed with the success of his radio ads encouraging people to spend every waking hour in the pub – responsibly – funny bald man, Dara O’Briain is set to take his lovable delivery into the awkward hearts and minds of thirteen-year-olds all over Ireland.
 “For Big Tobacco to stay profitable we need to start 500 teens [...]

Michael O’Leary has grabbed headlines again with his latest move now being a surcharge on prolonged, psychological unhappiness.
“We trade in misery at Ryanair, and no-one is going to come on one of my planes and stew in their own juices without paying me for the pleasure.”
The new charges will see recently broken-up people pay and [...]

Reports in Dublin social circles say that Gavin Friday is to undergo a sex change operation in Seattle next week as he tries to resurrect his career.
Friday, best known as a friend of Bono’s and for not being Simon Carmody, will travel to the world renowned Moyet Clinic, having grown unhappy with his lot as [...]

A County Kildare schizophrenic has been jailed for 5 years after being found guilty of raping himself in June of last year.
Leixlip man, Ciaran Gallooogaly, turned himself in to Gardai at Harcourt St in the early hours of 6th June 2008. The 26 year old bank official was in a visibly dishevelled state and wore [...]

A Stoneybatter man’s private club may have to be disbanded after an error in the Golden Pages brought about some unwarranted attention.
The Dublin Groomer’s Association, operating from Dermot Happle’s basement, has been in existance since 1997, the same time at which Yahoo first launched their Java powered chat rooms. Since then it has been a [...]

A 10 year old boy’s 5 year reign of terror over classmates in a Co.Galway primary school came to an abrupt end last week after his father “Raped the living the shit out of him”
Bully, Butch Masterson, had wreaked havoc over students at St. Lukes Primary school in Tuam since enrolling there as a 5 [...]

After the glitz and glamour of Hollywood and the Oscars two of the young stars of Slumdog Millionaire are said to be struggling to adjust to life back in the slums.
Both Azharuddin Ismail and Rubina Ali have returned to their former homes and, according to local media are ‘acting up’ as they try to come [...]

The heroic moaners of Irish sports-journalism were left chewing on their pencil-ends this week end, when Irish rugby captain broad-sided them with a dollop of semantic philosophy in a pre-match press conference. When asked his views about the upcoming game against England, O’Driscoll said:
“Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing [...]