Broadcaster, actor and full time Twitterer Stephen Fry is wanted by the Metropolitan Police this evening after causing the deaths of four people in South London.

Detectives believe that the shock of Fry responding to a Tweet, a short message sent via Twitter, proved too much for the unfortunate user who went by the handle of ‘@lodunbou56′.

“This is a criminal investigation now”, confirmed Detective Andy Hammertongs. “From what we can gather @lodunbou56 sent a message to @stephenfry saying it had taken him seven hours to fully evacuate his bowels after a night out on Guinness followed by a crafty Vindaloo on the way home.

Fry responded and we think the shock of it was too much for him and he had a heart-attack. When his wife came in and found him dead she checked his computer and could not believe that someone as famous and with so many followers had taken the time to express his astonishment at the length of @lodunbou56’s poo.

The death Tweet, as it has become known to Twitterers

She too suffered a massive coronary before falling against the wall of her flat, knocking a heavy clock off the wall of the next door neighbours. This fell onto the head of the man next door who collapsed on top of his paraplegic wife smothering her to death.

If I have my way he’ll be going down for a good stretch. When will celebrities learn that interacting with the general public can only lead to tragedy?”

A spokesperson for Fry said that he was ’saddened’ by the death of @lodunbou56 and the subsequent tragedies but said he had done nothing wrong.

“This is just a consequence of technology”, said Fry’s close friend Jonathon Woss on his BBC2 radio show. “Although I bet me and Wussell Bwand could fuck the shit of those corpses”, which prompted outrage from the Daily Mail who said that fucking the shit out of corpses should be the sole preserve of the monarchy.