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Mutant zombie spotted in Manchester
There were frightening scenes in Manchester this weekend as a real life monster prowled the streets and terrorised passers-by.

Brave photographer was eaten after taking this snap
Reports were made to police at around 1.30am as revellers in the Princess Street area were faced with the hideous beast. It is thought that the zombie, who had already feasted on the blood and brains of innocents and was making his way back to his lair, took a wrong turn and ended up in the popular nightclub area.
“It was so frightening”, said Linda Catona (31) from Stretford. “We were just outside the nightclub trying to start a fight between our boyfriends and some other lads who were just trying to get a taxi home when we heard screams. Then people started fleeing down the street like that naked girl in Vietnam who got all her clothes burned off.
At first we were all like ‘What’s going on?’ but then when we saw why they were running we ran too. There were people falling all over the place. He was just coming down the road going ‘Raarrrr’ and ‘Grrrrraaaraaargh’ but his guttural bellows were nowhere near as scary as his face. I’ll never forget it as long as I live. It will haunt my dreams forever”.
In the ensuing stampede at least 8 people were injured and taken to hospital, three of them are said to be in a critical condition.
“We’re not sure if they’ll make it”, said Dr Ranjeep Singh, “their injuries are very severe and all we can do is hope for the best”.
Forty-six other people were treated for shock. Greater Manchester Police have advised people to be on the look out and not to approach the fiend should they find him.
“He should be treated as highly dangerous”, said a spokesman, “he might be old and slow but this is one dirty cunt of a zombie, make no mistake”.


3 Comments so far ...
still that said I’d rather a walking dead paul scholes than a living Gallas…..or Robbie Keane…….or any member of team geeeeeeee beeeeeee
Comment on December 15, 2008 11:38 pmWow, he’s the fabled ginger-albino, right?
Comment on December 16, 2008 03:29 amDarren Fletchers Braiiinnnns………oh wait.
Comment on December 16, 2008 09:24 am