Newspaper of the Century | The 2008 Hijinx Awards
Gallas launches further attack on teammates
Having hit the headlines for his remarkable attack on his own team, Arsenal captain William Gallas has followed that up with a player by player critique of his teammates on his personal website.
This is sure to infuriate manager Arsene Wenger even more who is mulling over whether or not to strip Gallas of the captaincy. In terrible broken English Gallas goes through the Arsenal squad one by one and leaves personal comments about each player.
Goalkeeper Manuel Almunia is called ‘A blonde spanyard with a moustache of merde’ while Cameroonian no-hoper Alex Song is rated as ‘worse at the football than a new dead spastic’. He says of Theo Walcott ‘If running fast was enough to win the football match then Arsenal would win all games by ten goals’ and new arrival Samir Nasri is ‘not the new Zidane more like the new Kilbane’.
And not even the club’s top stars are spared the ferocity of Gallas’s wrath. Cesc Fabregas, the undoubted cream of Arsenal’s crop, is written off for ‘not being enough black like Makelele’ while Dutch striker Robin van Persie, believed to be the player Gallas referred to in his previous outburst, is said to be ‘the kind of manboy who would rape Jesus’.
Many experts believe it’s time for Wenger to not only take the captaincy away from Gallas but to sack him altogether. Former Arsenal legend Christopher Wreh said “These comments are quite simply intolerable. A manager as perspicacious, erudite, percipient and accredited as Arsene Wenger will not brook such indiscipline. I would fully expect that Gallas be launched into orbit or made answerable for his repugnant utterances by a swift thrashing with the birch”.
Arsenal’s season has been a roller-coaster ride so far with poor results against small sides such as Stoke, Hull and Spurs cancelling out good performances against the likes of Manchester United. Irish Sentinel sports correspondents tell us that Wenger is likely to spend significantly in the January transfer window and he will be adding experience to his young squad.
At least three Dublin under 14 teams have been scouted already to find players who would increase the average age of the Arsenal team.



2 Comments so far ...
“Former Arsenal legend Christopher Wreh”
Heh.
All the same, I’d have him back right now.
Comment on November 23, 2008 03:56 pmLovely fella that Gallas…..I like a player who speaks his mind and says it like it is……more of it…..bwahahaha
Comment on November 24, 2008 12:42 am