Paddy Power has closed its book on who will be the next President of the United States after Democratic candidate, Barack Obama, received the ringing endorsement of Aslan front man Christy Dignam.

Crazy World if McCain gets in, says Dignam

The Finglas troubadour has become renowned for his political insight and analysis – and has backed the winning candidate in the last five elections. It is now believed that many of the undecided voters will sway towards Obama having waited for the singer’s pre-election statement. This is known in American political circles as The Dignam Effect.

Speaking to CNN he said “I’ve thought long and hard about this and for me there’s only one choice. It’s got to be Obama. Let’s face it, McCain is a bleedin’ spanner and yer wan Palin is about as intelligent as Bosco. I was debating this very point with Simon Carmody the other night over a few scoops in The Long Hall. He claimed that McCain and Palin was the only choice for America if it wanted to be taken seriously but I just said ‘Look you, you’ve been wearing a leopard skin coat around town for years. What do you know about being taken seriously, ya fuckin’ spoon?”

With the November 4th poll drawing closer by the day it now seems that Obama’s lead is unassailable, especially as McCain’s campaign is being continuously hampered by running mate Sarah Palin’s gaffes. In an interview with Fox News Palin referred to Obama as “that terror nigger” and claimed to have more foreign policy experience than Henry Kissinger simply because she’d won a game of Risk the night before.

She also caused outrage amongst women’s groups across America when asked about the feminist movement. She claimed that under her command the suffragettes would increase the number of flights they carry out and would target Iraqi insurgent bases to put an end to the conflict in the region once and for all.