Newspaper of the Century | The 2008 Hijinx Awards
Apple sub-notebook to debut on the 14th October
Apple nerds across the globe today were whipped into a frenzy of flubbery joy following the publication of leaked photos of the Cupertino company’s brand new notebook (pictured).
The images appeared on the web just days before Apple’s October 14th media event where Steve ‘El Savior’ Jobs is expected to reveal a hotly anticipated sub-$800 notebook.
Through various contacts on IRC, 4chan and MS Comic Chat, The Irish Sentinel has obtained a document outlining the complete technical specs of the new netbook, as follows:
CPU: NEC V30 running at 8MHz
RAM: 512 KB
Screen: Monochrome Green LCD
Resolution: 320×200
Storage: 4MB internal HDD
Optical drive: none
I/O: RS232 serial port
Power: 8 Ever Ready ‘Blue Seal’ batteries
Operating system: LisaOS
Communication: 9600 baud acoustic coupler
In conjunction with a revolutionary manufacturing process that enables Apple to carve the new laptop cases out of raw chunks of bakelite, Jobs hopes to take a slice out of the burgeoning netbook market currently dominated by Altair, Commodore and Sinclair.
It is hoped the new computer will enable users to increase their smugtivity by a factor of ten under normal operating circumstances, and by up to one thousand whilst sitting in Starbucks mulling over a venti mocha.
: We asked what Tommy Dumpvalve, a disgraced scoutmaster from Termonfeckin, thinks of the new computer
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One Comment so far ...
Does that mean my new BBC and Dragon computers will soon be defunct? Where will all of this end? Outrageous.
Comment on October 10, 2008 11:09 am